Just hoping that one day, before I would find my prince, my king would go home and stand beside me, to make me feel secured, loved and appreciated, just like before.
I was quite depressed last Sunday for not having a father to greet or even to text to, a HAPPY FATHER’S DAY. I was a bit anxious about it since my friends, colleagues and cousins do have their father’s by their side. Pushing them to greater heights. And also, I was too, disappointed of you for being to cruel, to be able to do this to us.
nahh. It’s so hard to admit how much I miss him… In his strong arms I first felt secured… In his side I always feel loved… but… We are not too important that he chose to leave us and be with somebody else. May be just may be he never was happy with us. That he may be feeling stuck like a faggot with us. It hurts to think that he never was happy with our existence.
I used to be papa’s little girl then…I love sitting on his lap, cuddling in him… sleeping beside him with his arms as my pillow… miss the moments where I would pretend to be asleep but not really just to be carried to bed…
I really miss the food we used to share. Linagang Baka o Baboy, native Manok na tinola, adobo or Humba… Carabao’s brain… I am not saying that I can no longer it those foods now that He is not around, it just that, there is something different with his cooking sense that once tasted, it will never be wasted.
I cannot really understand what is happening until now, that it already is sinking into my nerves that there is only a 10% of him going home and live again with us. Of course, he already have two new kiddos needing him, but aren’t we needing him too?
I know Papa that there is a very small chance of you to read this, but I am hoping that you would. Please remember that life is full of chances. Feel free to go home if you want to, but please do not bring anyone except for your humbled self and caring heart, I am always ready to forgive you, to accept you, to care for you. But as said, life is full of chances and I am hoping though that you would come back… I love you papa!
Belated Happy Father’s Day!
Love,
Lovella
Smiling through Life 